"Sustainable" is the New "Smurfy"

You likely noticed how the Smurfs used the word "Smurf" as an all purpose fill-in, a shibboleth, and a way connecting and showing how cool they were.  Of course, it can also be used in other ways, as in when Grouchy yells, "Oh, good Lord.  Who SMURFED?  That smells terrible."  Or when Neil Patrick Harris actually sang, "So, I smurfed her just a little kiss, like this!" while pretending to play "Walk this Way" on guitar.

Managers in all sorts of firms have found the words, "transitioning our core competency" to have the same effect.

Now, "sustainable" is the coolest, most meanlingless word in English.  It's the new Smurfy!

What is the most ridiculous use of the "sustainable" that you have seen, readers?

The trend is ominous.  And, like must UNsustainable trends, some people have seen it coming.

Adamant

I reproduce here, verbatim and without comment, an email I received through the Duke System of Public Adamance and Diversionary Environmental Symbolism.

Dear Faculty and Staff in Trinity College of Arts & Sciences, I recently engaged in a friendly debate with my fellow deans at Nicholas School of the Environment and Pratt School of Engineering about which of our schools is the most engaged on the issue of sustainability. 

As you might suspect, I was adamant that we have the most committed and motivated faculty and staff when it comes to sustainability. My colleagues thought otherwise, so we agreed to settle it the old fashioned way -- through a competitive match up called Certified Sustainable: Battle of the Schools. I'm writing to ask for your help. The school that completes the most new sustainable certifications this semester will emerge the winner. From October 9 to December 4, we'll earn points for several sustainability certifications. Please select and complete the certification that applies to you from this list below.

• Staff - Green Workplace Certification ­ Collaborate with coworkers to certify your workplace The first step is to register now for a staff sustainability workshop on either Oct. 14 or Nov. 11 
• Staff & Faculty - Green Lab Certification ­ Collaborate with coworkers to certify your lab 
• Faculty - Green Classroom Certification ­ Certify your Spring 2014 courses 

The school with that has completed the highest percentage of new certifications for which they are eligible will win $500 towards a celebratory event. Other prizes include Men's Basketball tickets, produce from the Duke Campus Farm, and more. These certifications are within reach for all of us, but they do take a bit of time and effort to complete. Let's get a head start now so we can earn our bragging rights once and for all. 

 Let's go Trinity College of Arts & Sciences! Many thanks! 
Laurie Patton 

*********************************** 
Laurie L. Patton Dean of Arts & Sciences 
Robert F. Durden Professor of Religion 
Professor of Cultural Anthropology 

UPDATE:   A sharp-eyed reader noted that what Dean Patton may have intended was to assert that she was "Adam Ant."  To the extent that the contest is desperate, but not serious, I think this is likely true.