Tuesday, August 10, 2004

"I did NOT have sex with that stockbroker!"

Did my occasional radio appearance with the witty, over-caffeinated Winnipeg radio CJOB host Charles Adler, who has had his own problems with Canada's increasingly aggressive and self-righteous thought police and university nannies.

He asked a great question: why was Martha Stewart jailed on a rather vague stock fraud charge, when Sven Robinson, liberal MP, skated out the courthouse door after "pocketing" a $47,000 ring at an auction, right in front of security cameras?

Charles had started thinking of this after seeing David Frum's story, "Canada's Culture of Impunity," in the subscription-only National Post.

I think that the answer is this: Sven did the "full Swaggart" (like the full Monte, but baring your soul rather than your willie), mea-culpa-ing and abasing himself. "Yes, I did it, it was wrong, I am lower than a snake's belly, it was a cry for help."

Martha, on the other hand, said "Bite me, all of you! I didn't do it, and the people who came after me were all cowards and haters!"

Which leads me to think that only Bill Clinton can look us all right in the eye, and say (nearly in tears): "I did not have sex with ___FILL IN LIE HERE___", and have us still respect him in the morning. For anyone else, better to apologize and get it over with.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

interesting analysis, but bill was contrite once caught. martha was caught and still lacked any presentation of contriteness, which is probably why she didn't take the stand at her trial. as for bill, there was an interesting essay by louis menand, clearly not a member of the right-wing conspiracy, in his collection _american studies_ where he pinpoints the problem bill faced - although he was very comfortable with being a bullsh*t artist, he found himself in the ironic position of defending himself by claiming that he was not a liar, but was a bullsh*t artist.

I point this out because the actual phrase he used was "sexual relations", not simply sex. this was because, if you don't mind a little bs artistry, "sexual relations" is defined by intercourse. whereas sex may include anything. therefore, he did lie about denying their "improper" relationship, but did not lie in his denial of their "type" of relationship. whatever that "is", i mean was...

mungowits said...

A fair point.

and...thanks for the cite!

Anonymous said...

Oh, please. Why not take this sophistry a bit further and claim that, since Clinton was from the Ozarks, "sexual relations" clearly mean "sex with relatives?"

I think that liberals think they're smarter than the rest of us because they have to go through such mental exertions to rationalize their plainly ridiculous positions.