A. At a dinner, nice restaurant. Talking about dessert down at our end of table. Young woman, looking over at two older men (who have not heard our conversation about dessert) at other end of table: "So: You two getting any?" Loudly.
Stunned silence, at neighboring table also. Then laughter begins to leak out through every pore. Young woman covers face with hands. It takes several minutes to restore decorum.
B. In hotel bar, midnight, Latino native speaker, reading from Crackberry: "Hugo Chavez praises champagne!"
Rest of us: "What?"
"Champagne! Hugo praises champagne, for service."
"WHAT?"
"CHAM PAIN! THE ACTOR!"
Order is never restored. We had to leave the bar, to stop laughing. (story)
C. Walking in crowded Santa Fe street, during large festival. Young woman walking five enormous standard poodles. She gets tangled in leashes, drops one. Dog stands, patiently. Woman is nearly completely immobilized, with four leashes wrapped around her legs, reaches for handle of fifth leash. Dogs lick her hand, keep her from reaching it.
Man on sidewalk: "Hey, lady! One of 'em's loose!"
Young woman: (sigh)
D. Walking in same crowded Santa Fe street festival. Tall young woman wearing t-shirt with lots of writing on it, in what appears to be Spanish, written with a Sharpie. She is talking animatedly on her cell phone: "So, we did some mushrooms, and acid, and then watched a Teletubbies tape. I was so scared I didn't sleep for two days. It was horrible."
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