Monday, September 22, 2014

Monday's Child

1.  In the long run, all forecasts are dead.

2.  "I protest you!"  "No, I protest YOU!"  Or something like that.

3.  When ultimate frisbee is outlawed, only outlaws will play ultimate frisbee.

4.  But the pension funds were just SITTING there....

5.  The AVERAGE waist size for men is 40 inches?  I'm not sure that Angus, Ms. Angus, and the LMM together add up to 40 inches.  And I'm a fat man and my waist is 38 inches.  How can the average be 40 inches?  Good lord, people, go for a walk!


6.  Is it sexual assault if the man is too drunk to withhold consent, and the drunk woman jumps him?  Yes, it appears. Amelapay makes a good point:  The idea that men always want sex, and women never do, is pretty insulting to the idea of women as autonomous human agents.

7.  ACA was really a tax increase.

8.  Snail WIPED OUT by climate change!  But it "got better."  In fact, it thinks it will go for a walk.

9.  Climate marchers leave giant trail of trash in their wake

10.  Pabst-ovich!

11.  Bicyclists are just better people than the rest of us, and therefore should not have to obey the rules.  Saw one idiot on Brooklyn Bridge trying to ride his bike through Saturday tourist throng, yelling, "it's a bike lane!"  Something about the outside of a bike that inflates the ego of the inside of a man.

12.  I bet she was texting, too.  Darn multi-taskers....

13.  Descent into Barberism....

14.  A Coke, and a smile?

Headline:  "Armpit Hair Fire Causes Car Accident."


Dave Tufte said...

My waist is 38 for relaxed fit and 40 for regular fit. And I'm 6'1".

Yet, at around 238, my kids are fond of pointing out that I'm the same weight as Homer Simpson (that's official Simpsons' trivia).

There aren't that many men taller than me, so that statistic is saying that almost half of adult males are fatter than Homer.

Craig M. Newmark said...

You may be measuring your waist incorrectly. To check, visit Duke Endocrinology. I added a full 8" to my waist in seconds.


Pat said...

Is that your real waist size or is that what size your pants are? There is a giant difference - pants makers know where their bread is buttered. Size 38 is probably more like 42.

T Carc said...

Is this for realz Craig?

T Carc said...

I might need a favor