Monday, July 10, 2017

Listen up people, the Body of Christ AIN'T GLUTEN-FREE!


.....But it can contain GMOs.


This is an actual ruling from an actual religion in the actual year or our Lord 2017.


Since neither Tony Gill or Phil Magness are Pope, you may wonder why this bizarre edict has been issued.

Well, "The new rules are needed because the bread is now sold in supermarkets and on the internet, the cardinal said."

LOL, thanks for clearing that up.

So there you have it people. If you want to pretend that a piece of bread turns into a 2000 year old body, you better be damn well sure that bread has gluten. You know, just like Jesus!

5 comments:

Gerardo said...

KPC: things I didn't know I needed to know until I knew them

TMLutas said...

God is weird. You can't talk to anybody seriously on the subject for any length of time without coming to that conclusion pretty quickly. An entity that predates the creation of time that is one singular entity but contains three persons, and survives not only the vacuum of space but the very lack of space and time that would make vacuum a meaningful concept is pretty much outside what anybody can readily imagine.

The idea that the essentials of the bread and wine are transubstantiated into the body and blood of that being in a real way during the Sunday liturgy is positively a tiny leap of faith compared to the strangeness that I described in my first paragraph. Yet it's transubstantiation that gets more resistance.

Odd what people choose as their hill to die on with this theist stuff.

Anonymous said...

Dying on a hill is also part of the package.

Simon Spero said...

Also, Capybara are fish.

Also, Towing Jehovah features the miracle of Reverse Transubstantiation.



Angus said...

Great Comments! thanks.