Friday, February 20, 2015

Stupid Is as Stupid Does

Pick your favorite stupid part of this act....

Several obvious possibilities:

A.  There were skid marks UNDER the ice.  A mystery that would require Sherlock Holmes to figure out....not.

B.  The guy already had his shirt off, in case he was going to be on C*O*P*S.  In spite of the 15 degree F wind chill.  So, the only thing he actually planned was the shirt-off thing.

C.  They kept the buckets in the back seat of the other car.

D.  The friend, who showed up later, was ALSO drunk and was also charged with drunk driving.

E.  The artificial black ice could quite possibly have caused another car to run into the guy who had faked the accident.  Perhaps it wasn't C*O*P*S, but a Darwin Award, that he was going for all along.

F.  For reasons that escape, women seem to LIKE this kind of guy (hey, he was creative, and he had a BMW until he wrecked it, faked an accident, and had to go to jail!).  So maybe it's not even a Darwin Award, but a highly effective redneck mating dance.  Leaving me to draw the conclusion that, once again, women are the very hardest thing to understand or explain.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Pretzel Logic

Apropos of at least a few things, here is a very funny story from Michael Crichton:

A man goes on vacation and leaves his cat with his best friend. And he’s on vacation and the friend calls him up and says, “Listen. I’ve got some bad news. The cat got up on the roof and we can’t it down. We called the fire department. They came. The cat jumped to a tree. They went up the tree, but anyway, the cat fell, the cat’s dead.”

They guy said, “Oh, my God! How can you tell me in this way?”

He said, “Well, how should I have told you?”

He said, “Well, you have to prepare me. The first day, you should have called and said, listen, the cat’s on the roof and we can’t get her down. Then the second day, you call and you say the fire department’s here and the cat’s jumped to the tree, and the third day, you call me and you say the cat died, and by then, I’m prepared.”

The guy said, “Oh, that’s the way you want it?” He said yes.

He continues his vacation. Gets a call a week later, and his friend says, “Listen, your mother’s on the roof and we can’t get her down.”

The whole Crichton talk is pretty fun.

When The Internet is Regulated....

When the internet is regulated, only the regulated will have internet.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Sunday, February 15, 2015

Socialist Paradise

They been spending most they lives, living in a socialist paradise.

But now they have slogans.  That will help.

"Let us turn ours into a country of mushrooms..."

Okay, so maybe it won't help.

"Let us establish the climate of attaching importance to military affairs more firmly across society!" 

Hey, wait a minute.  That's what the U.S. has been doing.  Don't steal our slogan, Big Un!

"Let us build a fairyland for the people by dint of science!"

Hey, you stole that from our "climate scientists"!  This is getting very close to copyright infringement.  Make up your own government pathologies, North Korea!

(Nod to M.K.)