Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Terrorism: yer doin' it Wrong!

Islamic militants claim foiled attack This from the AP not the Onion, I promise!

BERLIN - An Islamic militant group designated as a terror organization by the U.S. claimed responsibility for foiled bombings that targeted the American air base at Ramstein, as well as U.S. and Uzbek consulates in Germany, the government said Tuesday.

The Interior Ministry, which is responsible for police and internal security, said the Islamic Jihad Union made the announcement on the Internet and that government computer experts viewed it as genuine. Three men were arrested Tuesday on suspicion of planning massive bombings against U.S. and other facilities in Germany.

"In an Internet appearance, the Islamic Jihad Union has taken responsibility for the foiled attacks in Germany and addresses the arrests of Sept. 4, 2007," the ministry statement said. "The attacks planned according to this for the end of 2007 were directed against the U.S. air base at Ramstein as well as U.S. and Uzbek consular facilities in Germany."

Uh, hi, we're the Islamic Jihad Union. Y'know those dudes that got arrested in Germany, the ones who didn't hurt anyone or blow up anything. The ones who didn't notice when the cops swapped out their explosive materials for dirt? Yeah, that was us. Ready to give up your wicked western ways NOW? No? Dam! Kthxybai!