New Wife Writes to Tech Support

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.3 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly before. The difference is especially noticeable after I had such good performance after Boyfriend 5.2 crashed and I upgraded to Boyfriend 5.3. (Boyfriend 5.2 and Boyfriend 5.2a were buggy and annoying, but after I ran the U&UrHand2Nite 6.1 add-on then Boyfriend 5.3 was apologetic, attentive, and obedient).

Even worse, installing Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs that had been working well. These included Romance 9.5, Conversation 31.6, and Personal Attention 6.5. Further, and worst of all, Husband 1.0 came bundled with a bunch of undesirable shareware, including WEATHER 5.0, MONEY 3.0, COMPUTER PORN 2.0, and SPORTSCENTER 24.7.

The truth is that WeNeedToTalk 8.0 no longer runs at all, PickUpYourWetTowel 31.6 just hangs, and Housecleaning 2.6 totally crashes the system to a bluescreen.

Please note that I have tried running NAGON 5.3, and DenySex 6.9 (which comes as freeware with WIFE 1.0) to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do? Now that Husband 1.0 has been opened, the Best Buy says I can't return it. And I can't the operating manual anywhere.

Signed, New Wife