Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Crime Pays: example # 10305

People, I give you the Ryan Braun (can his nickname really be the Hebrew Hammer? really?) guide to making it filthy rich in falling baseball.

1. Juice like a mother

2. Sign a lucrative contract extension based on your juiced performance

3. Serve your time right away when finally nailed so as to minimize your salary loss

4. Enjoy your $21 million a year for 5 years thereafter

All the other stuff, "betting his life" he never juiced, going after the poor sample collector, that was just for grins. Don't let it distract you from the master plan, which has worked to a T.

As I was man'splainin' this to Mrs. Angus, she asked me how in the world the Brew Crew would be obligated to make good on the extension when the HH was caught juicing.

Good question.

I guess that "caught juicing" is not part of the morals clause of MLB contracts.

But it should be.

Can we at least put Lil Ryan's 2011 MVP award in a closet somewhere with Reggie Bush's Heisman?


Anonymous said...

Reggie Bush's Heisman was tainted by off-field issues and didn't change his on-field performance for which he received the award.

IMO the Brewers should be able to at least rework his contract. Ironically, Bud Selig used to own the Brewers and I assume is in bed with the current owners. I'm sure the whole suspension was agreed to behind the scenes and everyone is getting something out of this deal.

Anonymous said...

I realize that the drug penalties are collectively bargained, but couldn't the Brewers file a lawsuit against Braun to break his contract under some sort of "fraud in the execution" claim?

Jack P. said...

Do teams have insurance on the large contracts they pay their players? I find it weird the Yankees would pay A-Rod $275 Million and not buy insurance. I suppose it's difficult to agree on what triggers the insurance, since you can "manipulate the underlying asset."

Ryan said...

Braun was a highly regarded talent coming up, including as a pure hitter (which very distantly relates to the size of one's muscles). Was he doping all the way back in college? This outcome is consistent with a 80-90 percentile outcome of his minor league record - and remember that is true of any star player. There isn't some sharp discontinuity in his record, like there was with Nomar Garciaparra. If anything, the drugs probably contributed to his ability to stay as durable as he is, as this is his first season where he was on pace not to play 150 games.

Braun would have been very wealthy either way and I doubt his career would be that different. If he were a .300 hitter with 20-30 HR instead of 30-40 HR a season, he'd still basically be Matt Holliday, and look how he is compensated.

The question of lawsuits or suspensions is crazy. In baseball all of this takes place through arbitration in accordance with the CBA.

Angus said...

Hi Ryan: Agree that Braun would not be a pauper in the counterfactual, but he made a ton of extra cabbage in the extension he signed and he doped up his stats leading to that contract. So I think it was profitable.

Also agree that CBA limits a lot of actions, but I don't think CBA would limit club putting a PED clause in the contracts they offer. Maybe it does though?