I sometimes travel first class, as an upgrade. On Delta, I get upgraded sometimes.
But for the trip back from LAX to Raleigh, I actually
paid for first class. And had a remarkable experience. Rather than rant, let me just hit the bullet points...
1. We arrived at LAS, and had to wait 25 minutes 50 yards from the gate, because they didn't have a ground crew. Really? No one knew we were coming? They could have borrowed my cellphone, if they needed to call ahead. Then at RDU, getting in at 5:50 am after a long flight, again we had to wait 20 minutes. I timed it. Delta is notorious for its indifference to customer service, but this was amazing. If you fly Southwest, you'll notice that they have the door open and people filing out within two minutes of landing. Delta wants to show you who's boss. They are.
Apparently, this happens a lot. I actually missed a flight once, because we waited 30 minutes to get a ground crew. Got there with just enough time, but couldn't get off the place to go those last 50 yards.
2. The head stewardess played video games on her cell phone the whole trip from LAS to RDU. Never once, not once offered snacks or drinks, except when we first got on the plane.
3. When I got up and asked for some water, she was indignant. "How was I supposed to know you wanted a drink"? Well, I don't know...Mental telepathy? Or perhaps stop playing Tetris on your cell phone and get up and walk through first class and see if anyone ASKS for a drink?
4. Never offered snacks. Not once. On a 4 hour flight. Amazing. I mean, the snacks aren't that great, even in first class. But she never even offered. Yes, I likely would have said "no." But gosh.
5. My tray table was broken. Actually broken. The hinge was splintered, and the table kept falling down.
6. My seat was broken, and would not recline. Four hour overnight redeye, and the seat won't recline. You may think that's not a big deal. It's a pretty big deal.
7. My air vent was broken. Literally broken, smashed up into the plastic, like it had been hit with a fist. Completely non-functional. And it was very hot, the whole trip.
8. At the end of the flight, the head stewardess actually said, "That was the easiest I've ever had a flight. No one wanted anything the whole trip!" Completely oblivious. She had no way of knowing whether anyone wanted anything, because she never entered the first class cabin to check. The passengers in first class talked to each other about this. "Do you believe how bad she is?" "Wow, this is terrible." We had, in fact, wanted at least some water on that long trip. But she never stood up from her smart phone games and even asked.
A note: It is fair to say, "Oh, poor baby. That's a first world problem. No snacks in first class...Awww." I hear you. But this was the first time I had ever actually paid for first class. It is not a mistake I will make again. At least, not on Delta.