Okay, at first I was taken in. But this is actually brilliant satire.
I mean, it goes through the whole "don't have children" thing, and buy "credits," which is asinine, and often a scam to boot. So, it could be serious. But then, the giveaway: If you really want to be "green," you will need to:
Slow Down Your Breathing
It sounds silly, but breathing is actually a major source of atmospheric carbon. One of the ways you can reduce your Carbon Footprint is to breathe less. That's right, breathe less! You're probably asking yourself how that's possible, but believe it or not, yoga is a great way to slow down the metabolism and reduce the need for excessive breathing. If you're not already into yoga, consider taking classes at your local studio. Soon, you'll be breathing less, and as an added bonus, feel much less stressed out!
Okay, THAT is funny. Well played, ma'am. To reduce your carbon footprint, DRIVE to a yoga studio. And since you will be having fewer children, you won't be needing to have all that heavy-breathing whoopee, either. Stop all that "excessive breathing." Brilliant. Because it's just goofy enough that it COULD be serious.
(with a nod to the Blonde)
UPDATE: As Trent M. notes in comments...
"My favorite part: on the "comments and coupons" page there is a coupon for "15% off 1 eco-friendly blunt trauma pet termination."
I mean, it goes through the whole "don't have children" thing, and buy "credits," which is asinine, and often a scam to boot. So, it could be serious. But then, the giveaway: If you really want to be "green," you will need to:
Slow Down Your Breathing
It sounds silly, but breathing is actually a major source of atmospheric carbon. One of the ways you can reduce your Carbon Footprint is to breathe less. That's right, breathe less! You're probably asking yourself how that's possible, but believe it or not, yoga is a great way to slow down the metabolism and reduce the need for excessive breathing. If you're not already into yoga, consider taking classes at your local studio. Soon, you'll be breathing less, and as an added bonus, feel much less stressed out!
Okay, THAT is funny. Well played, ma'am. To reduce your carbon footprint, DRIVE to a yoga studio. And since you will be having fewer children, you won't be needing to have all that heavy-breathing whoopee, either. Stop all that "excessive breathing." Brilliant. Because it's just goofy enough that it COULD be serious.
(with a nod to the Blonde)
UPDATE: As Trent M. notes in comments...
"My favorite part: on the "comments and coupons" page there is a coupon for "15% off 1 eco-friendly blunt trauma pet termination."
3 comments:
My favorite part: on the "comments and coupons" page there is a coupon for "15% off 1 eco-friendly blunt trauma pet termination."
In the "urgent news" section I saw this: "WE MUST SUBSIDIZE CARBON CREDITS FOR THE POOR". At last - a victory for universal health insurance, and hopefully a victory for universal carbon credits.
Check out the treatise on how carbon credits work....
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